Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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