Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
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