I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
