I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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