maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
