Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
