i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
