im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
