You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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