He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Randomize