I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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