idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
