i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
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