office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
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