he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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