Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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