If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Randomize
