i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
