brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
