So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
