If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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