We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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