You're so nebulous sometimes
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
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