this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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