i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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