If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
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