my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
