You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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