I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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