On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
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