You smell like a Billy Joel song
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
