Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize