Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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