yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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