ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Randomize
