it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I lost the right to judge tonight
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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