So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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