operation harelip BJ is a go
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
