I want to stick my p in your. b.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
