how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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