Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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