Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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