a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
