At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
