I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Randomize
