I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
