puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
