I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
