can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
