so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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